My mind is mostly focused on heading out the door soon for another Honduras trip, but a current topic that is getting a lot of attention right now is the meaning of marriage. This post from Q Ideas gives a sampling with links to several articles and talks addressing the issue. I thought this could provide some stuff to chew on for a while. I am also certain that there will be lots more discussion in the media to follow…

Well I’m back on the blog for a little while… till I head out for Honduras, and this is a great talk I heard while at the collegiate ministers’ summit in Nashville last week. Great content and great time with friends! 

I thought this was interesting… while it may not be a burning question you may be wrestling with, you can read it to find a perspective on the question that I happen to agree with.  Starbucks isn’t even the point… ironically even as I am in the process of launching a coffee shop.

Honduras continues to be a major focus of mine. Even with so much of my attention going to launching a coffee shop, the dream for the shop was born in Honduras and continues to be fueled by my desire to bring the plight of the world into clearer focus for us who may be far removed from the realities of the developing (or undeveloping) world. The education system in Honduras is cause for great concern. This has become one of our primary focuses in recent years, and one of the areas we see the most potential for helping in the future. We want to come alongside of the public school teachers to encourage and resource them to teach to the best of their capabilities. It is incredibly frustrating to have to “make more bricks with less straw,” and the teachers in La Acequia are willing and wanting to work together for a better future for these kids. This article hits the nail right on the head, though, and describes the situation we are up against. 

What a weekend we had in Philly… entertained an challenged at the same time at the Love & Respect conference at Calvary Chapel. The book is really good, but the live presentation hit a home run with me. The concept is simple and basic, just not easy! As men and women, and therefore, as husbands and wives, we live in a cycle that flows around love and respect. Men are most energized and motivated by respect while women are motivated by love. We often miss the simplicity of these intrinsic motivations. Dr. Emerson Eggerichs and his wife, Sarah, have done an EXCELLENT job of identifying this dynamic cycle, as well as what the alternative looks like. This principle is just as applicable on a larger macs-scale as it is on inter-personal level. I will continue to ruminate on it a while, but it is the respect aspect that I’m most intrigued by right now. All of us have a need for respect, but it seems that our culture is on a downhill course toward disrespect almost everywhere I look. I would like to buck that trend (and LOVE a lot more too). More thoughts are developing… later.

Here’s a 10 minute motivation for making your day count today… great stuff!

Here is a CDT article from Sunday’s paper that gives a fair representation of what we were trying to bring to the day. We were working along with Tyler and the Calvary Elements bunch at the hot chocolate station. The CSF gang are also friends. I was able to have a few very good conversations with students who were very grateful for some “instant warmth” on a cold and blustery day. Many bars and distributors were closed either for the entire day or early, which also helped keep things slightly more calm, but there were still many opportunities to accomplish the mission of the day - to get hammered. Stephen George and I were able to help one girl who had fallen in the street and appeared to break her nose. She was actually beyond intoxicated and wound up as one of those statistics at the ER. I have nothing against having fun… but it always hurts to see “fun” that destroys bodies, relationships and personal property.   

I think I walk philosophical… I mean when I walk to and from campus, I have lots of philosophical “conversations” with myself. For a few days now, I have been pondering what it means to be a true friend - as opposed to a casual or loosely-connected friend. I think this ability to “speak the truth in love” from Ephesians 4:15 is one of those qualities that separates the true from the wannabes. I know that I have benefited from friends who have been honest with me and spoken truthful words in a spirit of love that spurred me on to live differently. They could have just let some of that annoying stuff pass on by without saying anything and nobody gets hurt, right? Maybe… except the next time I happen to persist in my sinful flesh, being me, and making a mess of relationships rather than growing into a more Christ-like character. 

Truthing in love means that we trust someone enough to take risks because of the love side of the equation. That doesn’t make the act easy, just worth the risk. Proverbs 27:6 puts it this way, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.” Ouch! Being a true friend will pretty much guarantee that we will wound each other, but not to injure; rather to call our friends forward. I admit that this is challenging for me but for years the heart attitude that has brought this principle to life, to give and receive spiritual correction within scriptural limits, has been a growing reality in my life. I would much rather be on the receiving end, but I also need to step up the trust so that I can take these kinds of risks and hopefully reap the rewards of friendships that deepen and grow over time. I have spoken about this truth/love balance often when referring to engaging culture, but I am seeing this from a fresh perspective as I look to navigate the risky waters of deeper friendships. 

In the week following Joe Paterno’s passing, lots of words have been tossed around reflecting on his life and the legacy he leaves - legend, icon, hero. Other names has been far less flattering. For those outside of the Penn State community, the lasting of image of JoePa may likely be his final 3 months. For those of us who have been directly or indirectly influenced by the man, a different image emerges. While Joe definitely wasn’t perfect and certainly wasn’t God, it’s the hero word that has been on my mind a lot over the past 3 months. 

Earlier this month I had the opportunity to speak to a large gathering of students here at Penn State representing various campus ministries and spoke to them about this subject of heroes. When I asked them who wants a chapter in the book “Heroes of the Campus”, not many hands were raised. It seems that being a hero isn’t the type of thing that we intentionally aspire to, but someone we all long to have. This was an enlightening observation for me. 

Some people fittingly become heroes when the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity presents itself and the response is courageous, even heroic. For many others it seems that they arrive at that status almost unaware. For these heroes, making daily choices builds the kind of life that sets them apart from ordinary mortals and in many ways their influence affects multitudes in an unassuming way. I believe Joe (along with Sue) achieved this kind of status. While I honestly never called Coach Paterno my hero, in hindsight, he certainly earned my respect and appreciation for his life contributions. He came to represent the character and heart of the institution we call Penn State. His values and ideals shaped more than a football team. His contributions colored way outside the lines of Beaver Stadium. He won me over.

Joe lived a modest life just like the Penn State uniforms his teams have always worn. I believe Joe understood the influence he came to possess, but he chose to use it to make the Penn State “team” a better place. His statement on his memorial plaque was more than a wishful thought, but a mission statement that had teeth to it. He was not just a mythical hero but an accessible hero. Anyone could walk up to his door and he would open it to the world. These are truly commendable, maybe even heroic qualities in light of who he was. 

His last few months left a stain on his legacy, but so far, he is the only one who has come forward to share any sorrow or grief over not having done more. Unfortunately “not having done more”  just isn’t good enough for those who believe he should have done more, and is still unforgivable. That isn’t likely to change. Using the same standards, how many of us are to be pitied for ”not having done enough” when the opportunities have fallen into our laps to defend the weak and do right in the face of wrong? I’m not excusing Joe, but I don’t know of anyone who supports Joe who condones or is indifferent toward child rape. I have been forced to examine my own life more closely than I care to, but I am better for it. In the final months of his life he could have played the Hero Card, but  the way he dealt with adversity with humility and a gracious spirit  will be the final image I will remember Coach Paterno by. Thanks for the life lessons coach.